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As the temperatures drop, you might be looking for a special someone to cosy up to this winter, and an online dating service is a good place to start.
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Online dating and dating apps are now one of the most popular ways to meet a new partner and there are more than 1,400 sites in the UK alone, catering for people from all walks of life and interests.
Now is the perfect time to log on. Most well-known dating sites see their biggest surge in traffic on Boxing Day, with a second spike on the first Sunday after New Year — sometimes known as 'Dating Sunday'. And of course, Valentine's day is just around the corner.
The good news is, the range of dating sites has never been bigger. Whether you’re mad about dogs, passionate about green issues or a connoisseur of fine wines, you may just be a few clicks away from someone who shares your interests.
Here is our pick of the best dating websites and apps – not forgetting our very own website dating.telegraph.co.uk.
The best dating sites and apps in the UK
1. Eharmony
Best for: serious relationships
Free membership (limited)
5 million users in the UK
Modern matchmaking service, eharmony, claims over two million people have found love through their site. Users are required to fill out a short quiz to determine their core values in relation to others, and this powers many useful tools to help them find love (including compatibility scores, personality profiles, and relationship advice).
It’s free to register and download the app, send ‘smiles’ and pre-written Icebreakers to get the conversation started. However, you need to subscribe for customised messages and unlimited access to your match’s profile. Subscription costs from £7.95 per month for 24 months.
2. Match.com
Best for: getting back out there
Free membership (limited)
3 million users in the UK
Synonymous with online dating, Match.com has someone for everyone. Create a detailed profile, then find your potential partner through a criteria search. You can go on “zen mode” to be only contacted by those who meet your criteria.
It’s free to become a member but you can only send and receive messages if you are a subscriber. Subscription costs from £12.99 per month for six months.
3. EliteSingles
Best for: educated singles in their forties
From £19.90 per month
13 million users worldwide
Those averse to swiping left may enjoy EliteSingles – a site that uses a personality test to match users based on their compatibility. The comprehensive compatibility test takes into account looks, personality (with questions on how optimistic and ambitious you are, your social skills, how friends would describe you, and more), and what you're looking for in a partner – including whether or not you want children. Most users are looking for a long-term commitment and intellectual match, and 85 per cent of users have a degree and are between 30 and 55 years old.
You need to subscribe to send messages to your matches, as well as see all of their photos and leave comments. Premium membership costs from £19.90 per month for 12 months; or you can trial it for three months (£39.95 per month) or six months (£21.95 per month).
4. Silver Singles
Best for: Over 50's who are looking for love
Free membership (limited)
70,000 users in the UK
While Silver Singles is most popular in the States, it is starting to catch on in the UK, too. To register for the site, you must fill out a comprehensive personality test, which takes between 15 and 30 minutes and aims to partner you with your perfect match.
While profiles are quite detailed, they are kept behind a paywall. Likewise, you will need to pay in order to send messages to prospective matches. This premium membership costs from $24.95 for 12 months.
5. Our Time
Best for: meeting a variety of over-50s singletons in your area
Free membership
150,000 active users
Fairly new to the dating app scene, Our Time is a breath of fresh air for those who are tired of swiping and want to meet someone IRL (that's 'in real life' in text speak). The site hosts regular events for mature singles in your area, where you can meet likeminded people. Feeling shy? You can bring up to three friends with you for moral support.
The app is owned by Match Group, meaning your profile will appear on other dating sites – which widens the pool for meeting your potential partner.
6. Telegraph Dating
Best for: meeting like-minded individuals
Free membership (limited)
220,000 members worldwide
The Telegraph Dating site is a straightforward way to meet like-minded singles. As you set up your free profile, simply describe the type of person for whom you’re searching. Then, browse the site and view others’ profiles; once you find someone who you feel is a good match, send them a message.
A free membership allows you to read messages from potential matches and reply with a one-liner. Only paying subscribers can start conversations and write personal, customised messages. It costs from £12 per month for 12 months for a subscription. For an additional £10 per month, you can upgrade to Premium, where anyone can reply to your messages for free.
7. Parship
Best for: singles looking for a long-term commitment
Free (limited)
23,000 new members every week
Parship has a scientific approach to helping you find love. Relying on 40 years of findings on how to build a successful relationship, the site categorises users into 36 personality traits, and uses a matching algorithm of 136 rules. The compatibility questionnaire is extensive, and covers everything from what you look for in a partner to whether you sleep with the window open.
There is a fairly even male/female split in the users, and 52 per cent of them are graduates. The site welcomes 23,000 new members every week, and almost four in 10 find their partner through Parship. However, whilst it is free to sign up, take the comprehensive personality test, view your matches and send them 'smiles', you have to pay to be able to message your matches. Membership costs from £14.90 per month for 12 months, but you can trial the site for six months (£19.90 per month) or three months (£29.90 per month), too.
8. Original Dating
Best for: Singles who want a quirky way of finding The One
From £10 per event
Over 250,000 users
Tired of swiping right? Original Dating is unlike other apps in that it focuses on singles meeting up in real life. There are speed dating events (including virtual options) where you will typically meet between 15 and 20 people in one night. Unlike the speed dating events of old, Original Dating ensures there is an even ratio of men:women by asking all attendees to book online. You can subscribe for discounts and access to more exclusive events, or just give an event a go (prices start at just £10).
9. Lumen
Best for: mature dating for the young at heart
Free membership
350,000 users worldwide
Whether your children have flown the nest or you’re recently divorced, dating in your fifties is a bit of a minefield. That’s where Lumen comes in.
Some dating apps can be soul-destroying when conversations consist of boring pleasantries. Not so with Lumen. Your icebreaker message needs to be at least 50 characters long, which encourages interesting chats.
All accounts are verified, and profiles are detailed – with at least three photos and a lengthy bio. There are no paywalls on the site but you can only start six conversations per day as a free member. You can upgrade to 12 conversations per day if you subscribe for £24.99 per month.
10. OkCupid
Best for: quirky and open-minded singles
Free membership
4 million users worldwide
OkCupid has an extensive personality questionnaire, designed to increase compatibility. You can then inject personality into your profile by answering quirky questions, such as “Do you make your bed every day?”
Instead of being bombarded with messages, you can only message those with whom you have matched. Downloading the app and speaking to users is free but you can upgrade to Premium for extra features.
In 2014, the OKCupid app was the first to introduce 22 genders and 13 sexual orientation options. This inclusive outlook has made OkCupid particularly popular, making 91 million connections every year according to their site.
11. Bumble
Best for: empowering women
Free membership
22 million users worldwide
To redress the gender imbalance of dating apps, women have to begin the conversations on Bumble. Profiles are not as detailed as on some apps, but you can make video calls and get to know your match before you meet.
Lazy users are penalised on Bumble, as you only have 24 hours to initiate a conversation before the match expires. The app is free to use but you can upgrade to Bumble Boost, where you can see users who have already ‘liked’ you, for £11.16 per month for 6 months or even just £2.49 for the day.
12. HER
Best for: meeting like-minded queer women
Free membership
4 million members worldwide
HER is a much-needed breath of fresh air on the dating app scene, as it's dedicated to helping queer, bisexual and lesbian women find their ideal partner. The app is free and you can view profiles, add friends and start chats at no extra cost. Upgrade to HER Premium to filter users by sexuality, see who is currently online and more.
HER also shares LGBTQ+ news and events taking place in your area, and there are smaller chat groups where you can meet other users.
13. Inner Circle
Best for: young professionals
Free membership
3 million users worldwide
The adverts for Inner Circle look like promotions for Glyndebourne, featuring couples in black ties and cocktail dress. This dating app is selective and there’s even an application process. In 2016, there were 450,000 applicants on the waiting list.
Tailored to matchmaking ambitious, career-savvy young professionals, Inner Circle claims to have made 10,000 successful matches. The app is free to download, but you can upgrade to premium packages. There are also exclusive members events. Polo in the park, anyone?
14. Happn
Best for: busy people
Free membership
50 million users worldwide
In the films, people lock eyes on the train, start a conversation and then fall in love. In reality, we are too awkward (and British) to act on impulse. That’s where Happn comes in. If you have crossed paths with another user, they'll show up at the top of your Happn page. If you like what you see, you can send a heart and, if they send one back, instigate a conversation.
Your exact location is not shared – just the approximate area. The app is free but you can upgrade for Premium benefits including up to 10 ‘Hellos’ and access to the list of people who like you.
15. Hinge
Best for: young people looking for love
Free membership
5.5 million members worldwide
Hinge is the new kid on the dating game block, known amongst millennials as ‘the relationship app’. To set up a profile, you need more than just photos and a one-line bio. Instead, you must answer three questions (e.g. 'My childhood crush?...Andrew Garcia') and potential matches can 'like' your answers and start up a conversation.
The app is free to download and you have unlimited access to profiles, swiping and sending messages. However, you can upgrade to a Preferred Membership, which allows you to better filter results.
16. Tinder
Best for: casual dating
Free membership
Over 50 million users worldwide
It’s the Godfather of dating apps. Tinder, the photo-heavy app with 2 billion views per day, allows you to swipe right to potential partners, then message and arrange a date. The app is responsible for 1 million dates per week, according to the site.
Tinder seems geared towards casual dating. Profiles are not as detailed as on other apps, but you can include your name, job, company, education, location and links to your Instagram and Spotify accounts.
17. Badoo
Best for: keeping your options open
Free membership (limited)
Over 497 million users worldwide
If you want to be spoiled for choice, give Badoo a go. When you sign up for the app, you select what you're looking for – just to chat, casual dates, a serious relationship or stay open-minded.
The app has a swipe function but it’s also possible to drop in on people’s live video chats. Profiles consist of basic personal information and you get notifications when someone likes or messages you. This, however, can be overwhelming as there are so many users. Premium prices depend on the package and subscription you sign up to, but start at £2.29 a week
18. Coffee Meets Bagel
Best for: romantics
Free membership
7 million users worldwide
As you can probably tell from its moniker, this app’s main fanbase is in the States. However, it certainly brings something different to the dating game. Its stand-out USP is that the site only sends you one match every day, which means you have to really consider whether this person is a good match, as opposed to swiping left without giving them a second thought.
That being said, you can click on the ‘Discover’ tab and like a handful of people per day. If you match, the app suggests a personalised icebreaker (e.g. “Ask Thomas about his recent trip to Thailand!”). It’s free to download the app and speak to your matches. However, you can upgrade for a Premium membership to see if your messages have been read and to access stats on your match – how long they typically take to reply, for instance.
19. Qemistry
Best for: Young TikTok-obsessives looking for love
Free membership
Designed for 18-35 year olds of all genders and orientations, Qemistry is a breath of fresh air on the dating app scene. It's still in its infancy (it only launched on September 3 this year) but it has great potential. To use it, you upload videos to your profile – whether that be TikToks, Instagram Stories or a video of you telling a joke or having a boogie. Unlike curated photo profiles (with their emphasis on abs) this lets your personality shine through.
Best religious dating sites and apps
20. Christian Connection
Best for: Christians looking for long-term commitment
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Free membership (limited)
110,000 users worldwide.
On Christian Connection, users can create detailed profiles, outlining their jobs, political views, dream holiday destinations, favourite films and, of course, religious standpoints.
If you find someone you like, you can ‘wave’ at them and send a message. Membership is free but this only allows you to match, send waves and preset replies. There is a free 3-day trial for a taster of the subscription service; if you subscribe, from £24 per month, you can send unlimited messages and get discounted entry to social events.
21. Muzmatch
Best for: single Muslims looking for love
Free membership
1 million members worldwide
You may recognise Muzmatch from their fun advertising campaigns (“Halal, is it me you’re looking for?”). Yet the free dating app has plenty of other stand-out features which may explain its 25,000 success stories. Firstly, it protects your privacy – you can use an alias and keep your photos hidden or blurred until a later date, so there’s no danger of friends or family stumbling across your profile.
All users are verified and you can opt to have a chaperone (a ‘Wali’) in your chats. The app is free for you to swipe, match and chat. However, you can upgrade to Instant Match, where you can talk to someone before they have liked you back.
22. JDate
Best for: Jewish singles
Free membership
Dating Site
The net's biggest Jewish dating service, JDate, has been around for nearly 20 years. Following its redesign in 2017, it is now a more streamlined service. After uploading a bio (typically 100-150 words) and up to 6 photos, you can browse others’ profiles to assess their physical features, hobbies, religious practice and what they’re looking for.
It’s easy to keep track of potential partners with the Look Book, a list of who has liked you back. Plus, there’s a community feel to the site due to the Kibitz Corner, where the site provides daily questions and you can compare answers with your matches.
How to avoid dating scams
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Dating expert, James Preece from jamespreece.com shares his tips on how to avoid scammers:
- If you’re suspicious about a profile report it to the dating website or app so they can investigate it.
- Try doing your own detective work – ask them for their full name and look them up on Google and social media.
- Don’t be afraid to question their authenticity – if they are genuine they won’t mind you trying to verify them.
- Remember, they may spend months building a relationship with you and will only ask for money once you’re emotionally involved.
- Ask a friend for advice as they are not as emotionally involved as you, they may be able to see something you can’t.
- Look out for fake or stolen photographs. You can use sites like TinEye.com to check the authenticity of a photo and you can try doing a reverse image search on Google (by clicking on the camera logo in the search bar and uploading an image) to see if they are using a fake picture.
- Never give out too much personal information, such as your home address, phone number or email.
- Consider setting up a new email address to use for online dating and perhaps even get a cheap Pay As You Go phone to use for making phone calls.
For more tips and advice on successful dating after 40, visit our Mature Dating section.
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